Boy Scout Troop 325
Scoutmaster's Minute
Top 10 Dog Peeves About Humans
March 15, 2005
By George Denise, Scoutmaster
(found on the web, source unknown)
As I have said before, generally, Scoutmaster Minutes are supposed to inspirational; anecdotal stories to make you think. Nonetheless, occasionally, some things are just too good not to share. On that note, I give you the Top 10 Dog Peeves About Humans:
- First off, passing gas and blaming me... not funny... not funny at all!!!
- Yelling at me for barking ..... I'M A DOG, YOU IDIOT!
- Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly
whose walk is this anyway?
- Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose... stop it!
- Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew
your stuff up when you're not home.
- The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whoooo
Hoooooooo , what a proud moment for the top of the food chain.
- Taking me to the vet for "the big snip", then acting surprised when I
freak out every time we go back!
- Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I
haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
- Dog sweaters. Hello??? Haven't you noticed the fur?
- Finally, would you please leave the toilet lid up! It’s handy, it’s always there, and you don’t have to keep filling my dog bowl! How’s that for a deal?
Now lay off me on some of these things. We both know who's boss here!!!
(You don't see me picking up your poop do you ???)